Men at Work

So I work with a lot of men. I would say pretty much all my colleagues are middle-aged (re-)married/divorced/separated men with children. Of course, there are women on my floor and in this building, but I would say at every meeting, I am one of at most 2-3 women (and those women are based in NY not Jersey City). I was realizing recently how odd it is that this is probably the easiest part of the transition I've gotten used to. Maybe it's because of Stern being so male-dominated, but I'm completely comfortable (and even somewhat prefer) working with men. And these particular men all have that same self-deprecating, sarcastic, cynical point of view (at least this is how they portray themselves in the workplace). I think it's common being a professional in NYC when you're an over 30 year old man to put on this type of machismo that has both the inferiority and superiority complex going. Same tone of voice and inflection. The higher up and smarter you are, the kinder you can be...but no one ever really has that objectivity and that confidence about themselves. It's funny being able to sense the insecurity underneath and the overall unhappiness with life. The men walk around waiting for rejection, no matter how blessed they probably really are.

The only thing I am uncomfortable with is when they start chit-chatting about the way of the world. There's this one man who came into the project later. He's known as a genius for one of the systems we need to deal with, yet he seems a little bit socially awkward. We've been instructed that he never be in a meeting with certain higher ups. Otherwise, really he seems like a normal human being. He just likes to talk A LOT. And he has no tact in talking about things that he doesn't realize would piss some people (namely me) off. He likes to just say whatever his opinion is, and there's never any room for anyone to go against him without being awkward. I thank God that he doesn't really find me stimulating enough to talk to (honestly, it's because I don't know how to tell him I completely disagree with him). This is especially true when he talks about marriage. He talks about how this modern age where both sexes work has ruined the system of marriage and how family is "supposed" to work. He says before people "had to stay together", but now it's just impossible. I take issue with this, being raised by two working parents who have been going at it for 31 years, despite such a rough beginning. Maybe I agree that it's harder to take care of children, but I completely disagree that because it is now inconvenient to be married and working, then that's more reason to give up. Convenience and circumstance really shouldn't have anything to do with it. Ugh, I'd hate to get married without any real sense of what it's really for and of the God who created it.