On Friends and Happiness

First day back at work after a longer, less routine weekend is always really hard. Especially when I slept so weirdly. My brain/head is not liking me right now.

So I really can't believe I saw friends everyday this past weekend. In working life, it's really hard to have the energy and zeal I once was able to give to my friendships, most especially since I'm more of a one-on-one deep conversation type of gal. That's rough when you just want to let loose and have fun when you're not wearing a suit, or maybe you just want to wear jammies all day knitting at home. No more lunch dates, afternoon siestas, or late into the night sleepovers. It's one of those pieces of the transition that I definitely prepared myself for (made easier when the majority of the people I did these things with left the city before my Senior year). But it then makes me so grateful when I'm able to hang out with people in a big group, and I'm comfortable with everyone involved. It's such a blessing for an introvert with acute social anxiety to feel socially comfortable. I'm really impressed when plans end up actually happening, considering the city, individual schedules, individual temperaments toward planning (a majority of my friends are now Perceivers, in high school ALL my friends were Judgers....how did that happen?!?), and the emphasis on individuality in general.

We went to Amy Ruth's, this restaurant in Harlem known for their chicken and waffles (yes, together). Below is a picture that Sunday (Dan T's friend) took of us with his BBerry...I changed his life teaching him all about the Google apps he can use on it. Also, if you look at the picture slideshow, the first picture is of Ben and a fish in an aquarium at Red Lobster. It was sooooo cute because it came right up to us when we waved at it, then it looked directly at the camera when I took a picture. INSANE!

There was a lot to like about Obama's inaugural speech. But I think the thing I caught on to was what he said about needing to know ourselves before we could take on a challenge. Reminded me a lot of the need for repentance/rejoicing. I've had a lot of freak outs at this particular season in my life, but I find a lot of progress in the fact that I can actually think through it. I've been able to take a deep breath and actually take stock of where something is coming from or what am I actually reacting to. I would say, most of the time the answer lies in me not trusting Jesus. Not trusting that He is who He says He is. Obama talked about how Americans have the same creativity and productive force that it had last week, last month, last year. The Holy Trinity has been the same even before time began and forever and ever. And the Bible says I no longer live, but Christ lives in me. So when I lose sight of Christ, so goes my self-assurance, my self-awareness, and my true self.

I meant to write about this last week, but it's been great to marinate over its themes on top of everything else that life has brought in the last few days. Like a tree drinking from the living water. A while ago, (I think like my Junior year), Ben told me about this sermon by Jonathan Edwards on Christian Happiness. He wrote it when he was like super young, as a teenager or something. I think I would say it has one of the most important messages a young, American Christian needs to hear. The thesis includes the three reasons why every Christian should be happy: "First, because no worldly evils can do him any real hurt; secondly, because of those advantages spiritual joys and satisfactions, he enjoys while here; and thirdly, more especially from the joyful hope and certain expectation, of the enjoyment of the perfection of happiness, eternally, hereafter." I don't think I can truly expound further, only because I haven't even finished it, but it's almost like, you don't have to if you're a Christian. You know this! If you love God, then you know God loved you first, you know nothing can truly hurt you, you know we can enjoy the most powerful and intimate relationship any human being can have in this world, you know that absolutely EVERYTHING will be perfect and MEANINGFUL in the end (from that toe nail that doesn't look right, to that friendship that devastated and failed you).

It's funny reading through it because it's like Edwards is just brimming with glee, talking about happiness. He just keeps going on and on about it. It leaves me feeling the conviction of not thinking about it all the time and giving into despair, at the same time empowering me to be the child of God I don't deserve to be, but through His sacrifice, truly am.