Sex and Dating

I'm afraid this isn't going to be as juicy as the title might suggest. Just some general thoughts from the last few days.

I saw Kinsey on Sunday. It presented a lot to be thought about. Mainly though, I thought it was cool to see the life of this man (however true to life it really is) who genuinely cared and oddly enough grew up to be as much of an elder son as his preacher father was, saving himself and others instead of acknowledging the Savior.

It was also interesting to see that because he embarked on this project to measure sex in a scientific way, it made him wrestle with real questions more. He was adamant about sex being just animal behavior, but later on, it was hard to ignore the things that pointed to the realness of sex on more than just the natural level.

I also saw this article in the NY Times today. He just talks about the trend in young people nowadays to casually hook up, not with strangers but with friends, and only later if you really like the person deciding to date. He mentions how it emphasizes the friend groups (since no one is exclusive in this model), so no one feels left out if their not dating. It's amazingly brief for such a subject (much like this post is going to be). Like this quote: "So why is there an increase in hooking up? According to Professor Bogle, it’s: the collapse of advanced planning, lopsided gender ratios on campus, delaying marriage, relaxing values and sheer momentum." He says a lot in so little.

Christians could easily be really judgmental, obviously. Oh, these people not taking sex seriously. But for serious, young Christian communities have our own version of "hooking up", the deep emotional one. Living the Christian life is not so much about the behavior, but the heart behind the behavior. It seems NO ONE takes this seriously enough (however, I think that's how God's Law, can be this tool of grace and love, protecting us from hurting one another). I've certainly blogged about emotional dating before (in my xanga account), so I don't need to again. Just thought I'd tie it in to the subject.

Having never really dated anyone besides Ben, of course, I'm fascinated by the wide continuum that people are on when it comes to dating, especially since I'm in a very specific place in that continuum - the serious relationship. So having only experienced the two extremes it kind of taints my perspective, I admit. Some people casually date, just cause it's fun and you get to know cool people. According to the article people have started to replace that with casually having sex for the same reasons. I have to be honest in saying that I'm a little uncomfortable with anything that has to do with the possibility of marriage being casual. Besides, shouldn't the reason for dating be a Godly one, just like for anything else we do? The reason for relationships of any kind for that matter? I am committed to my family because they are who God gave me to serve. I love my friends because God loves me and has changed me, not because I'm just that cool and was born that way. I date Ben because God seems intent in using each of us for each other's sanctification and journey towards Him.

Again though, I must say, not knowing anything aside from what I have experienced, I hardly have a balanced perspective I'd like y'all's thoughts on it...leave me some sugar on the comments page.